THE MARRIAGE DILEMMA !

SCENE : 1

Ok! So it was after my eldest cousin's marriage celebration that it dawned into my family, "we need to find a groom for Deepthi soon!, how old is she now Celine?". My mum's till then happy face looked troubled and answered, "she will turn 24 this July" and to complete it she gave the sad grim scowl . 

SCENE : 2

Me and my besties, we celebrated my 24th birthday like never before. It was one happy day where we had a lot of fun and laughed a lot, did a lot of crazy stuffs. As the day was coming to an end, it was then my parents turn to surprise me and they did. My dad and mum gave me the usual birthday kissies and hugs and looked up at me for 5minutes. Ok something ain't right somewhere. I sat down, trembling inside but it all sealed with my 24 teeth smiley. My dad, "Deepthi we created your profile in the matrimonial sites(to my surprise I was there on almost all of those sites, guess my parents just didn't want to leave out any available option), I think this is the best time to start the search". I just couldn't stop smiling, and thinking to myself, this time next year my status on FB would be 'married', condition abh officially serious hai, what next! 

SCENE : 3

Searching for guys was even more hilarious. You see a good looking guys profile >click> you get his page >click 'personal information'. Everything starting from his family details, to his job, to his present salary, to the amount of property he owns are just clicks away >click, his partner expectations, ok now this is the best part, "God fearing, fair, tall, pretty, prefer to have a working partner, should be compatible, and someone who can uphold the family traditions."

At a scale of 4-5 a day I was then sending "interests" to profiles and reviewing the received "interests" ,  & yes grieving over the "rejections" I received. Condition tho bohath serious hothe jaa raha thaa, but why not, this was now becoming my favorite pass time!

SCENE : 4

I always update my friends with everything and anything happening in my life. And this was something I couldn't leave out on. And to my surprise their reaction was, " good that they started searching, your young, just 24, ok even if your job isn't that great, you at least have one,put a rather outstandingly pretty picture(there is always PHOTOSHOP), your rating is going to be high on the marriage market!!!!".

SCENE : 5

Then as the received interests were being reviewed and liked by both parties, then comes the next stages, the Skype chats, with the family first which when cleared you move on to the next level, i.e the guy, then the meeting, then the enquiry which would mostly be about your financial status, your place in the society, how known your family is in your locality etc etc.

I could stand strong through only 6 of these, after which I felt completely broken down and down the drain went my dream of ever getting married. Condition abh mere liye serious tha, what I thought was just a child's play was nothing even close to it.

I was one among those ladies who believed that love isn't something that happens overnight with a person. You cannot plan it, you cannot arrange it, it has to happen when it has to happen.

SCENE : 6

A few weeks later... "What she has decided to go forward with it? Search no more? Did you enquire well about the guys family, do they know all about us ? But why so soon?", it was my grandma. My mums reply which made me proud of having someone like her as my mum of course, "its her life, her choice, after marriage we will make sure her visa is cancelled so that she doesn't come back crying to us :P ". I was overwhelmed with joy , content inside. Yes, mission accomplished!

SCENE : 7

Be it love marriage or arranged marriage, be it you marry at the age of 24-25-26-27-28-29 whatever be the figures, nothing matters!!! What matters is whether you like the person!! Looking at an outstandingly handsome guy/glamorously hot girl , with the jaw dropped, eyes wide open expression you cannot say that yes your in love with that person! Talking ones or twice with the person, falling for his/her extremely polished and designed good nature should never become your point for decision making as well, trust me its an initial advertisement campaign which like all promotions don't last for long! Neither can you say that a guy/ or a girl who had been your best friend or your lover for 5-6-7 or any number of years it be is going to be your life long partner and that marrying anyone else would just mean ruining your own life!

Marriage isn't a business deal, it isn't about getting hitched with the Mr.Perfect/Ms.Perfect, this isn't a bollywood movie where all you two would do for life long would be sing and dance on desi love songs. Its a special bond between two, where your factors for choosing that person needs to be how happy he/she can keep you, how he/she could stand beside you forever through all your troubles , its about how much he/she understands even without you being expressive about things. The definitions for love and marriage are basically never ending, but the one thing that can be said is that love and marriage has to go hand in hand.

Did I say, I am getting married in a few months :D :D "GIGGLES" CONDITION ABH VERY VERY SERIOUS HAI. 

-THE END-

(CURTAIN FALLS)

PS :

SPECIAL THANKS TO : Bharath Matrimony, Shaadi.Com, LifePartnerIndia, VivahaBhandhan.com & ChavaraMatrimony.com  for helping every Indian girl realise her life long dream :P 

ATTRAVERSIAMO

We met, worlds apart,  different in many ways...


He is more composed, calm, organized, sensible, kinder, smarter...
Me on other end, is me, never thinks much, quick with everything, arrogant, confused, the list is just endless you could say...


His tastes be it for music or food are all clear, serene, classy in a way and in every way.
Mine on the other hand don't make sense actually, music I like everything and anything, food I am just a confused hogger.
Movies and books neither does it match of ours...


Even now I don't have one single thing to jot down here which is common between both of us...except ... yes of course...we love each other, which is indeed and will always cover up for all of these uncommon factors. And maybe thats the reason as to why, for us,discovering each other, getting to know our worlds was exciting, has been exciting & still continues in the same exciting way as it was right from the start.


What makes him different from all the others?.. everything!


He is a common man, handsome looks, kind at heart, lives life simple and a family guy. But what I liked in him?.. simple... "he makes me smile". He takes care of me, takes control, and knows how to bring out the best in me and yes all he does is he really "makes me smile".


Soul mates! People who were destined to meet! Serendipity! Perfect pair! .... all of these and none of these would I use for us! What's between us, is something magical and so beautiful to even bring it down to mere words & so what's between us stays between us, I just refuse to share it with anyone I would giggle and state.


Everything and anything has its time. Nothing's planned. Discovering myself again, and to depth to how I could love a man I found through this journey of mine and it has only rejuvenated me. My heart is at ease now.


" I found my word for the day "attraversiamo" , it means lets cross over". And so yes when I knew he was the one meant for me, I knew I needn't wait for any more signs. And now has come the time for it.






                                   -NOT THE END..THE JOURNEY STARTS HERE-

Once upon a time I had my very own happy little world.. :)

Back when I was a kid I lived in my my own little world where I believed in everything & anything.....

Making wishes being my favorite among them all...
When blowing the candles of my cake I used to make a wish..
When my tooth came off I used to wrap it in a small piece paper with my wish written & keep it below my pillow..
When seeing a shooting star I used to make a wish..
When my eyelash accidentally used to fall out I used to make a wish with it..
When it was christmas time I used to write my letter, the long list of wishes for the secret santa..

I believed in a world where everything came true through wishing.
I believed in fairies, angels, cookie monsters, in a list of fancy mythical creatures in short..

I smile & the world smiles back at me.
All are good & the biggest crimes one could commit were steal a jar of cookies, a box of chocolates or a pack of ice cream!

These are the times when I wish I had never grown up..
The way I was I was the happiest one of all..
I was the little princess of my little world were none could harm or steal my joy..
& yet I would always love to go to that happy little world of mine.. one fine day :)

The Sunset

A beautiful Sunday evening, though it was humid, there seemed to be a warmth in the wind..
I sat there by the edge of the rocks, by the sea.. staring deep into the waters...
I had the strong urge to just take a giant leap right into the waters, to just go as deep as I can, just to see how it feels like..maybe..
It would be cold...bitter cold.. the first gulp I take of the salty water would leave me breathless for a while..a few seconds or maybe even minutes... but then a big gasp for air after the jump could prepare me further for the dive.. deeper and deeper into the mystical sea...
To the deepest point I could go, enjoying the wonders in the sea through my journey...a world beyond our imagination at times it seems to be, but the sea has always fascinated me from quiet long...

The strong rush of cold wind, leaving me goosebumps made me come back to my senses..
Oh yes, I was still sitting right there by the edge of the rocks.

I got up from where I sat, dusted the sand off my feet and butt and from there I could see behind me, the cave, which I still hadn't yet explored..
Well its never too late for anything, two..three..four steps and I was already by the mouth of the cave...
Its a small one, but all the more seems dark inside..
Walking through it , gave me a slight chill... just imagining myself to be, maybe inside one of those caves, in movies, which are dangerous,unexplored, and shelters the scary creatures.. hahhaa, really I do have a wild imagination..
As I ran my hands through those walls, I could feel some writings...
I took my phone, and through its faint light, I saw them, pictures...not done by ancient cave men of course but by the modern men LOL "Ahmed Loves Laila" , Call me "55***45**"...
Really its funny to think what people get out of these, there perspective of seeing this maybe different, but I would call it utter stupidity..
Walking, and walking, I reached the other end of the cave.. so much for the chills and imagination.. Nope nothing here...nothing that interests me to be frank...

I went back and sat in my old place.. by the edge of the rocks..
Its past 5, oh yes sunset...
You could see the sky turning a husky yellow first, then orange...
Capturing the most beautiful picture with my mind lens, I looked keenly at the setting sun..
As the huge tennis ball went down and down, I saw it disappear right there into the sea..
It just made me smile... the end of a day, leaving all your worries and tensions there behind you, all you need to do now is give your mind some rest and a wait for a new sunrise, do not carry your worries of the day, nor carry it forward to the next, no burdens, no tensions, every day has something interesting for you, it will be more promising and lovelier than the previous one.. give it a smile and wait for the new huge tennis ball to rise..

The sunsets ... but for a new sunrise....

The Toothless Smile

Its coffee time! I walk into my favorite cafe and grab a seat by the window. Sipping my coffee and watching an old man tie his shoelace I get bored, all his attempts to tie that lace seems to be ending up in vain, come on is it that hard?! I get back to my coffee which is almost half done, should I order one more, well maybe. Thats when I hear a soft giggle behind me. Its a family, a dad , mum and the owner of that giggle , a small pretty little kid. As I watch her, she is digging into her waffles, pouring syrup bits all around her and basically making her own cute mess on the table.She licks the syrup off her spoon, her tiny fingers, and wipes it on to her frock. Then she looks up, notices me, twitches a bit and smiles.. "wallaaahh", all four of her front tooth are missing, what more do you want to make your day go better. I wave a "hie" at her, and she smiles again, the cute "toothless smile".

Her spoon falls down on to the floor, she looks down and then looks up at me, so I hold my fork up and show it to her. She slowly gets down from her chair and walks over to me, her tiny feet and those little tiny steps, all the more cute. She takes the fork and gives a run for it, hahahaa. Now she is back and ready to give the mess she made, a grand end. Level 1, complete, bits of waffles syrup here and there, on her frock, her fingers, all over the table, but her plate is all clean and licked up and she is happy looking at it,the "toothless smile" again. Her mum takes the napkin wipes the syrup bits of her face, she is satisfied and fully content with her work.

My coffee being done, the second one, I slowly get up, grab my bag and as I walk over to the door, I here little steps behind me, I turn around and there she is, I kneel down and she offers to me her little jelly toffee. I take it from her and give her a small kissy on her rosy cheeks, hehehe she is happy and so am I and to add on it there she gives me, her "toothless smile" and runs back to her parents. I get up and as I head over to the door I feel at peace somehow.

 Its funny how your quiet boring evening turns out to be a good one towards the end... All thanks to the "toothless smile"..!!

SIGNATURE INTO AUTOGRAPH....





I look around I see people happy
I see they have a much better life than mine
I see their satisfaction from their chosen paths
And then I feel like being this big looser in life
What do I have? Were did I go wrong?
Who's to be blamed?
The corrupt system,which eats away your brain..jails your thoughts..and..limits yourself into a nutshell..
Or is it the so called fate?ulitmate destiny?
How do you fly,when your wings have been cut off?
How do you breathe,when you have forgotten how to?

There's always a tomorrow after every today..but hope my today's tomorrow will be much better than my yesterday's today..

And I learned the way to success is the longest and a "never look back path"...
The day when finally signature turns into an autograph...!!!!!!!

The word Iam mostly faced with..NOooo

I don't know why but the word I am mainly faced with 's no. A girl can't do this,a girl can't do that etc etc but why? Even in this 21st century there are still people who aren't ready to accept the changes to be bought about in this fast moving life.

I am a person with a lot of dreams but "shoot" my circumstances never allow me to let them free.I would love to travel a lot, go for hiking, bungee jumping etc but to be frank I haven't yet tried any of this.Wish even life was as easy as it looks to be like in movies...the problem arises then somehow a solution's found, your loved ones come up to help you and then the curtain falls "and they lived happily ever after".

Its true what William Shakespeare once said "All the world's a stage, and all the men and women merely players: they have their exits and their entrances; and one man in his time plays many parts, his acts being seven ages".But in my life the sad part's I feel I haven't played any of my acts properly.I haven't been truthful to myself or even life as a whole.I have been doing things on someone else s order's, a mere puppet whose threads are being pulled by many at the same time.

But now my conscience isn't allowing me to go forward the way I am going now.Its time I take a firm stand.Now its time I follow what my heart says,all this while I had been stopping myself from doing so because I felt it would hurt my loved ones but now its time that things change after all "there's no gain,without pain".Now my path's clear and my will to strive for my goal even more stronger than before....Now its time I play my role cogently...